Do MateyMates Snog?
by E arth. K id. T ree. H ugger
Summary: What I think the last scene of ATMBISBM should have gone like. G/D. Can't really do a good summary - best just to read it. Oneshot


_**A/N: I didn't really like the Gee and Dave getting together scene, so I have decided to write my own. The start will be similar to the book, but not exactly the same. Partly due to the fact I don't have the book with me as I'm at my dad's and partly due to the fact that I wanted the start slightly different too.**_

_**Disclaimer: Louise Rennison owns the Confessions of Georgia Nicolson series and all of the books in it, and all of the phrases and a couple of sentances spoken, and she also owns the fabby characters. I just own the plot.  
**_

_**Enjoy!**_

_**x**_

I could hear Jas coming back with my Midget Gems.

"Can I have the black one?" I asked without looking up.

"You cheeky minx!"

It was Dave.

I looked at him.

He has the most gorgey eyes.

Vair dreamy.

"You said, 'Are these my basoomas I see before me' and everyone heard you."

"It's hard work being a Biscuit. You have to grab any comedy opportunity you can."

I raised my eyebrows at him.

He raised his higher.

I let mine drop.

And no, I don't mean drop off my face.

I mean I relaxed them so that they weren't raised.

God, you people!

So I let my eyebrows drop.

I just wasn't in the mood for games.

Dave sat down next to me and put his arm around me.

Why is he always so nice to me?

"Jas came to find me. She said I could probably help you better than she could."

Thankyou Jazzy Spazzy!

"I take it you know what happened then?"

"Yeah. Jas told me."

We were quiet for a while and then I said, "Who's your secret girlfriend? You know, who you dumped Emma for."

Dave looked at me like I was bonkers. "I already told you Gee – The Queen."

Huh?

Oh yeah… When we were at the camping fiasco and when I first picked up Dave the Tart.

"The queen is eighty-something years old. Who the hell are you talking about?"

"Gee, sometimes I think you are the thickest chick alive (A/N: yeah yeah I know. It's part of what was in the book. But this ain't gonna be over as quickly. Read on!). Figure it out."

"How am I supposed to figure it out?"

Dave sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Honestly, Gee!"

I don't quite know why he's acting as though I'm dumb.

I probably don't know his so-called secret girlfriend.

She probably goes to St Mary's or something.

"Dave, what school does your secret girlfriend go to? Give us a clue."

"Gee I already told you – the Queen. But if you must know… she goes to this school."

Who can it be?

Can't he just stay single for a while?

Must he have a girlfriend?

If he didn't have a secret girlfriend, I could ask him out.

Wait – what?!

Do _I _want to go out with Dave?

I can't.

Dave and I are just matey-mates.

Or are we?

Do matey-mates do number 6 on the snogging scale?

I think they do – well my matey friendship with the laughy man.

"Gee, are you alright? – well, I know you're not that alright cos of what happened with Masimo, but you're being vair quiet and that is not like you at all."

Should I ask Dave what he thinks?

I'd best not.

**30 seconds later**

"Dave, do matey-mates snog?"

Oh damn, I asked him.

Oh well, at least I'll get to see what he says.

He's doing pretendy beard stroking.

Pray God he doesn't turn into Rosie.

"Well Gee… I don't actually know."

"But you and me snog…"

And then Dave muttered quietly what I'd been thinking. "Or are we just matey-mates…?"

I think I have the answer.

No.

I don't think matey-mates _do _snog.

At all.

And I don't think Dave and I are just matey-mates.

I think…

Oh Buddha, shoot me if I'm wrong (Which I don't think I am cos Buddhists don't hurt anything), but I think I luurve Dave.

The Laughy Man.

Oh God.

I HAVE to know who this secret girlfriend is so that I can kickbox her!

"Dave?"

"Yeah, Gee?"

"Really who is your secret girlfriend? Tell me. I can't guess."

"Well alright," he said, "Gee, it's you, you silly KittyKat."

Me?!

Does that mean I have to kickbox myself now?

"Dave do I have to kickbox myself?"

"What, Gee?"

"Well I was just thinking I had to know who your secret girlfriend was so I could kickbox her. Too bad I don't know how to kickbox."

Dave started laughing.

"God, Gee," he said, "you really are good value. You are, and I am not joking, completely bonkers."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Not."

"Are."

"Not."

"Are."

"Shut up."

And I snogged him.

And he snogged me back.

Are we official snogging partners now or not?

It's vair confuzzling.

I don't know, but I know one thing for sure:

I'll be the last to know.

Now bugger off so I can snog my maybe-boyfriend in peace.

_**A/N: So, what do you think?**_

_**I was a bit out of it when writing this, so I don't think I got enough larfs in it (if any) and I think it was too short for my liking, but tell me what you think in a review.**_

_**So go forth and snog wisely.**_

_**Lottie**_

_**x**_


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